Comments on: Parenting Licenses, Anyone?

By: crazybtch669

crazybtch669 — Tue, 31 Jan 2006 06:17:48 +0000

I think you have asked a very interesting and intriguing question.
I agree…and disagree. Here’s why…

I, myself, got pregnant at the age of 22. Yes, it wasn’t planned…and yes it was terrifying….and the father did not want me to keep the baby. That was not even a thought for me. I had made a child, and I was going to be responsible for him. Everything, from the day I found out I was pregnant until this very day, has revolved around making sure that his life on this earth is the happiest & healthiest it can be. Someone like myself has enough to deal with in my day to day life without having to prove to someone that I’m a good mother. Who’s to say what’s right or wrong for a child? Other than the obvious (abuse…neglect..etc), would we want our government deciding what the ‘risk factors” would be?

On the other hand….his father, would be someone who should be “licensed” to breed! He has a minimum of FOUR children that I am aware of. He’s also had at least TWO lives aborted. He does not financially nor emotionally support our child. At 28 years old, this man continues to sleep around and make babies….so, yes, I wish there was a way to ‘license’ people like him.

I honestly don’t think that licensing this would work. Free Will is a beautiful gift, but being responsible can be difficult sometimes for people. Even the people who are licensed to drive still drink and get behind the wheel….People with STD’s still have unprotected sex….

So, unfortunately, I don’t think having a license to breed would improve parenting. Maybe….a license to have sex??

Great question.

By: marnonyahoo

marnonyahoo — Mon, 30 Jan 2006 17:09:48 +0000

Georgia b, you are a beautiful person! I love and respect your “about me”. I am with you 100%! I answer many parenting question (and ask a few) and cannot believe the advice I read. I can’t believe some of the abusive advice that parents offer, and that the asker picks! So many believe in spanking them for everything the child does. The choose punishment over discipline. I’ve answered a few questions about biting. Many said to “pop them in the mouth,” or “bite them back,” or “put hot sauce in their mouth.” People pick these as the best answers!

Parents consider themselves as experts. These same parents have not read any parenting books, have not taken any parenting classes, and are threatened by the advice of an educator. I have offered some links to some great parenting articles I have found. One was against spanking to a mother who questioned when one should spank their child. The person I provided a link to considers herself an â€œexcellent motherâ€ (Sheâ€™s 19 and has a 7 month old son). She later posted a link, including the article, and asked why people listen to these â€œcultsâ€ like Freud (she spelled Froids), that they do not have answers and should parent how they feel is best and not listen to professionals.

I am a Montessori preschool/kindergarten teacher. I started out as a preschool teacher with only a few units under my belt. I have since taken tons of child development and parenting classes. I am, by far, a much better teacher today then I was when I first started out. It takes a lot of time to learn the best ways to discipline and raise children. I do not know a lot about raising teens but, you bet, when I have them I’m going to educate myself even more!

It makes no sense to me that people who adopt and foster parents have major requirements before parenting, yet anyone can have children without learning a thing about parenting. The only thing that parents are taught are how to change a diaper and how to breastfeed. Nothing else is expected of them! There needs to be some requirements! It’s not fair to our children!

By: Emily O

Emily O — Sat, 28 Jan 2006 07:34:25 +0000

Theoretically, this seems like it would make sense, but just think what would happen if tis was carried out in this country.
With our government being run but right wing neocons, I could just imagine who would be deemed suitable parents – conservative christians who are pro-war and never have a dissenting opinion!
There would be no more mixed race babies, and I’m sure if you’re muslim our country wouldn’t let you breed!

By: Adoptive Father

Adoptive Father — Sat, 28 Jan 2006 03:26:10 +0000

I think this is a wonderful idea. My wife and I have state-issued foster care licenses.

By: sarajbc85

sarajbc85 — Thu, 26 Jan 2006 16:35:31 +0000

that is 100% crazy, why on earth would you try to tell someone that they cant have children unless they have a license… thats like trying to tell someone that they can fall in love unless they pass a “love” test, you know so that they know the”risks” of falling in love. there is no reason why someone should try to regulate who can & cant have children. why should you or someone else for that matter try to say what parent or person is more at risk for being a bad parent? & yes it is someones right to have a child, its not only our right to reproduce but that is basically our only instinct that we have kept all these years. as soon as we hit puberty all we want to do is have sex, & what does sex do? hmmmm it makes babies… a liscense?? get real!

By: no_doubt_about_it

no_doubt_about_it — Mon, 23 Jan 2006 21:58:52 +0000

Parenting requirements, hmmm, they should start with the parents of the new mother having a baby. I don’t believe there is any way that this would work, mainly due to MANY people that shouldn’t have kids to begin with. And WE ALL HAVE THE RIGHT TO HAVE CHILDREN!! Only under duress circumstances I would say no, the parents should not be allowed to have children. Such as two people that were married and we know they could not be responsible parents, mentally challenged in a more severe degree, when they were only barely able to take care of themselves. There are many people that have children that have mental issues, more than most of us realize!! There are other things I feel should be controlled, such as getting a drivers license at 15, 16, should not be allowed, drinking laws 21yrs. of age…please, so many teenagers know someone that is going to buy it for them. Many other things, but I will stop there, b/c I don’t want to get on my soap box, but this scenario you have proposed is really not how it should be. Good thought tho, to some degree!! =)
~PEACE~

By: Bella

Bella — Mon, 23 Jan 2006 04:29:27 +0000

while we are doing that…why don’t we also have a license to eat…this way..no one will ever get fat or unhealthy. then why don’t we have a license to have a job…this way, no one will hire an idiot again. then we can have a license to have sex. this way, we will never have to worry about an STD again. and anyone caught have an STD will be killed immediately to avoid spread of infection. and for families that have children with disabilities, they can be killed too since we don’t want any genes spread around that would cause an imperfect human being.

aww…a perfect world. HA HITLER!

By: barbertono

barbertono — Mon, 23 Jan 2006 02:09:07 +0000

It would be great if you could insure that people would at least get the training that getting a license would require, and I completely agree with your intentions.
However, how would this licensing be enforced? Sterilization? Mandatory prison time and/or fines for those who father or deliver children without the proper government approval?
Like it or not, we are where we are, and people do have the “right” to care for their children. They do not, however, have the right to abuse them, and we’re not making such great strides in that area of enforcement, are we?
Your only option is to keep focused on the ideas you’ve expressed, and do the best job you can to prepare yourself and whoever else you can to be the best parents you know how to be.
Even then, there will be those who think you’re doing a terrible job, who would “never do it that way with MY children!”
This will probably be your mother-in-law.

By: Kara K

Kara K — Sun, 22 Jan 2006 17:24:18 +0000

I have often thought about this numerous times myself… however, I think we should prevent the bad parenting b4 the pregnancy…. you need a building permit by law to build etc. when you want to start having a family…. you need to apply for a permit of some sorts… background checks, psycho analysis… dont take the baby away and/or give a mother the opportunity to make bad choices during her pregnancy, nip it b4 it begins… eleminate these children from suffering… and punish thier parents if they choose to disobey!

By: micah z

micah z — Fri, 20 Jan 2006 15:36:35 +0000

Because when you put regulations on something like that worse things can happen. How would you controll conception of the whole population? You can’t have ovulation police! What about all the unplanned pregnancies? Would you kill the unborn baby? What about all the people that pass the test and still mistreat their children? Much mental illness associated with abusing children occurs after the baby is born and the mother is going through post pardum issues. Adoption is so strict because it is an answer to all the unfit and unplanned pregnancies and has a controlled way to be regulated. A class and a liscense will not prevent a stressed out father from drinking because he is stressed due to his piling bills then going home and hurting his wife and son. Or a mother that took the class and has three kids but decides to only abuse one of her children. There are way too many factors of society to control such a matter. Marriage is supposed to be your liscense to reproduce with society and religion keeping you in check, but that has gone down the crapper due to our social break down of norms and values. People should not have children at all because our world is not a safe place and i am scared to death for my 7month old son